The endless calamity of Saturday

I went to bed at 5am this morning, not because I couldn't sleep but because I wanted to stay up and talk with Rachel and Danielle, and then when I got to my room I decided I was going to play some guitar.

Naturally I slept until around 11 or so...because I don't require but about 6 hours...

So then began my quest...

I traveled to Target and purchased a swiffer...I'm just tired of the damn floor always looking like shit...seriously. I'm tired of it. I used the swiffer. Already it is better to me. Also at Target, I bought a 12 pack of cokes, some hot pockets, 9volt batteries (B-Batteries)...and a 20 oz. coke...so Mader can get the coke rewards...anyway....when I returned I opened the 9volt batteries and proceeded to suggest that Mader put a brand new one to his tongue. He did. It was sweet. A little bit of a funny moment. I think he regretted it...

I then put the official "Mader-licked 9volt" into my Alvarez RF2oSC...and tuned my guitar....the guitar is now charged with MADERness for complete rocking ability and total kick-assness. I believe the saliva residue of Mader on the 9volt will propel me to FAME...or worse case scenerio...it just becomes all crappy and acidic or something...either way it should be interesting.

Mader went to do something...I can't remember what, but then he was complaining about his cell phone not working correctly. So we went to railroad bazaar's Verizon kiosk...and while there he played a hollow body bass and I played a Guild GAD-30RASB, I was pretty impressed with the guitar but not the guitar's strings. Anyway, those chodes at railroad sent us packing to another verizon place on down the road (but not before Mader got two double stackers from BK)---well, we went to this mythical verizon place....and could not locate it. We drove all around Target's shopping center. Finally we ended up at Circuit City's kiosk and couldn't hear because of the BASS in the store...and I wasn't happy about it so, I let Crystal the kiosk girl know about my unhappiness. NOT COOL for me to do but it was kinda funny. She told us where to go and this time we found it. It was hidden in the corner down below 72 and behind "Babies-R-US"--and impossible to find if you didn't know exactly where to go. So we found it and went in, and they kept his phone and by this time I'm hungry for BK too...and that's what we do, there's a BK right across the road from this place...and I get food....and get annoyed by a young kid wanting me to buy donuts for a fund raiser with cash that I don't have. I asked him if he took debit and he asked me what debit was....

Traffic was really bad, but I wanted batteries (B-batteries) for the Keyboard to try out some of the percussion beats on it with my guitar playing...and we ended up at Walgreens, where I saw a "Club" on the steering wheel of this like...93 Acura Integra or some shit...it was ridiculous. I got the batteries....Mader got an envelope and we discussed mailing a Hershey Bar to McGuill college in Canada...AMERICANA BITCHES. But in the end, Mader decided he'd eat the chocolate and almonds and just send the school a graduate school application instead. SHIT. I knew he didn't have any guts.

So now I'm at the Bevil Center using the internet because RES NET FLOSSES WITH ASS HAIR, and I was going to do my homework but I can't until I take the section 1.1 quiz which can only be taken at the library...BULLSHITNESS.

BLEH....maybe it's time for another meal.

This is not what I've become but what you made me into...

"I am not going to depend on anything but myself." -J.Frey


It is about 11:45pm, and I see this...then I go run...now it's 12:45am...and I don't think I'll be sleeping tonight.


"Where's my ring?"

---Where's your committment?----


"The Trees Get Wheeled Away" (Bright Eyes) [the bold parts are for Lindsey]

Anchormen spike their blood
Wear masks of mud
Cucumbers cut to fit their eyes
And so no one would know how tired they've grown
Of talking and telling their lies

While your tvs change stations scroll messages
Victims and Christians both drinking blood
And they pray for the destruction of all hatred
More often just those with hate for us

Cause it hurts when you discover one's worse and one's better
To suffer or cause others to
And you can live by your conscience
Now guilt is a concept
You're no longer subscribing to

There's a virgin in my bed
And she's taking off her dress
I don't know what I am gonna do
There's a song stuck in my head
And I can't help singing it
Oh how I hope my singing pleases you
Cause this is not who I've become
But what you made me into

Oh we got no health insurance
No cellular service
No disease they can cure
But we need more money to burn
So each person must learn the dollar amount they are worth

And your pills make me dizzy
Forgetting my body
I watch as it walks away
And I just keep drinking the poison
And smoking the cartons
a pack and a half a day

So when time comes to claim me
My friends and my family will gather around my grave
And they'll believe that they knew me and loved me and missed me
And all call me by my name

So imagine what you want
And then hold on to that thought
Cause that's as close as it will ever come
and believe you're where you are
just keep acting out the part
but at the end of the day the trees all get wheeled away
and you'll be standing alone in a blank blank space

so believe you're who you are
and just stay in character
but at the end of the play the audience walks away
and you'll be shivering cold on a well lit stage

And this affects me how?

Sometimes I really miss the opportunity for the social life I'm missing out on. One would think that being a RA would help someone meet people...and it does. I meet people when they misbehave and break the rules. They don't see me as a fun person. They see me as the uncool authority figure that's going to get them into trouble. I just wish they realized that it is completely up to them whether they get into trouble or not. I don't hold a gun to their head and say, "Hey break the rules."---Anyway...that's just a thought I've been having these nights alone in my room with the pager, or out and about with the pager while everyone else is having fun. Just that every now and then it'd be cool to be able to have fun at a party on campus or off campus and meet some douchebags and some girls that aren't really cool anyway but seem cool because alcohol is involved.


*sigh* such is the burden of the student-leader.

There's gonna come a day

Do you think I do not know
When I am forgotten
I know where you go
When you're not here
You are there
When you're not with me or them
When you're not around
You are with him
Do you think that I stop living
That I cease to breathe
When you are not around
No, I don't give it or you a second thought
I go on walking
I go on doing
I stroll out staining
The surface of the river with paddle swirls
I do as I please
I am not beholden to you
Others go on kneeling
But I've got my head above that crowd
Others go on believing
The shit you lie aloud
Me, I know better
You are no prophet
You are no saint
You don't know any Hell
Supposedly you're Heaven
And I've come to know Purgatory well
So keep your trinkets and kind words
Keep your thoughts to yourself
I'm not hearing them
I'm not seeing you any more
I will not be forced
I refuse to believe
I will not practice this religion you're selling
I will not be deceived
I've got your back pocket
I've got your last night's dream
I've got all you're looking for
Topped with peach schnopps and cream
Put your assets in an envelope
And mail them to your mom
Pack your boots and your room up
Stop faking that you're blonde
I'm not like I was before
There's no refuge for you here anymore