I am a rock

So, I never realized that the sully dog was such a pain in the butt. Malissa has really spoiled that boy. Constantly whining and having to go outside at such GAWD-AWFUL times like 9:30AM...or something. NO really, he did wake me up at 4:30AM once...and that was once too many. I am happy however that he did not pee or poo anywhere in the apartment...at least not that I know of at the moment...I'm sure if he did and I don't know it...I'll figure it out soon.

Not much going on today, I got up at 9:30 and walked the dog, then tried to sleep again since I had such a late night talking with Laura. It's really hard to believe it is finished now. I think I lost quite a bit this time. Maybe more than I ever have. I've been at work since about 2:45, I needed plenty of time to get Sully settled back inMalissa's room before I got out here to work...I swear he barked for an hour straight...from 2:45 to 3:45, I never thought he was going to shut it. It's amazing how things can go from being alright to just being sad in the blink of an eye. I need to brush my teeth. They feel sugary...sticky...gross.

Work has not been fun. I do think I had a productive conversation with Tammy on instant messenger, and I did talk to Laura's friend Danielle a little...but I dunno. All Danielle seemed to want to know was why it happened, and I just don't really feel like talking about it. I guess maybe there isn't much to say. It didn't go how I wanted, and I feel I'm losing out...but I've felt that many times before and always been wrong...I hope I'm not this time. Anyway, I don't know how I'll react to being a friend. I don't know if I'm up to it just yet, or if I ever will be. It's all so complicated in my head, but it all comes out so simply when it's said. I write too much, and I'm very Granola (cheesey is another derrivative that could be used)....but I guess that's me. Who knows...

Malissa and Kelly are lost and gone forever...somewhere in Georgia. Samantha and Jennifer watch TV with Sandmeyer on the bigscreen...I sit lonely behind a desk missing her...and thinking of how odd it is now...at least it's odd to me.

I wonder what that Leslie Gray girl is doing. I called her yesterday but she was in a hurry to hang out with her sister and go to the movies. Said she'd call me back, maybe she will, maybe she won't. Who knows...

Sidenotes:
1. Sully just barked, just now.
2. I am not worried. I am not overly concerned.
3. Joe Ybarra, you keep on truckin man. You do what you have to. And remember Jared's advice. He has his moments of shining wisdom...though they are few and far between.
4. Love is a burning thing.
5. Love is pain
6. Love is hell.
7. I am in hell.
8. 16:28 in 88 degree heat...just not a fun time.
9. Is anything gonna go right this week...I doubt it...I'm in over my head now.
10. Why am I complicating things?
11. I wish I were old and retired. It'd suit my mood so much more than young and stupid.
12. COURTNEY where are you?
13. Screw school, screw the future, I just want to get a crappy paying job and live paycheck to paycheck. I don't need nice things.
14. I want to be Bob Dylan.
15. IF ONLY A MOTORCYCLE WOULD CRUSH MY THROAT.
16. I forget what 16 is.
17. I'm too tired to fight it.
18. BORED=BOARD
19. In your face Brandon Mader.
20. DO NOT APPROACH ME!